Spicy Surprise

In Life on May 24, 2012 at 11:44 am





Have you ever eaten chunkyish salsa, that didn’t seem too spicy and you got lulled into eating careless heaping chips full of said salsa only to get a chunk of a super spicy pepper and get red-faced, gasping for a cool glass of milk? [ok that was a run on sentence but are you following me?] I feel that way about the bitter taste of mourning lately. I will get the sense of calm, like, everything is ok, normal even, then…bam a chunk of habañero.


Last night we were singing verse after verse of “He’s got the whole world in His hands.” Asa & Judah were coming up with different things to say. We did Asa & Judah, Mommy & Reuben, Daddy & Grandma, you & me brother, then Asa said “you & me sister.” At the end of the verse Jodi asked Asa who the sister was. I expected him to say “you” to her, but he said, “she’s dead, baby sister died.” I don’t know what to do with that.


Many days I imagine my sweet little girl playing and smiling, but those thoughts drift into a sort of dull sadness. Then some little thing will happen that is sharp. That cuts. I know “He’s got the whole world in His hands.”

Even our “sister” Micah.

I know it.

I just don’t feel it.

  1. Really, Micah is the only member of our family that has felt the embrace of our loving God. Lucky girl.

  2. Oh, James, I am so sorry. I guess all of us have to partake our own bitter cup, and although we know the truth of the Savior, we still feel the sting. We are still praying for you both.

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